Friday, February 25, 2005

A Girl & 2 Guys

I can't think straight.
I am confused.
I am battling with my own emotions.
I am playing with fire.
and the situation goes haywire

What the heck is happening here? Is it possible for a girl to like/love two guys at one time? Some of you must think i might out of my mind, others might say that i am selfish.

I don't want to hurt either one of them..but i have the right to choose, rite?

The story goes like this..( a brief one )

I got to know both of them about a year thru the common platform used by most people nowadays..thru the internet. Both of them are younger than me but as people says age is merely numbers.

A approached me first. I kinda like him but i did not gave any answer to the question maybe because i did not sense the maturity in him. Later, he told me that he and her ex got back together and i am fine with that. Somehow things does not go well between them. We are still in contact and went out. I can feel that he regards me as someone special in his life with his expressions and words.

B is the guy i want to be with, so when approached me, i said yes ( until now i hope it's the rite thing ). The one problem with him is that he far away..a Singaporean. He do call every now and then. It's just that sometimes i felt that he's been so secrective. When you really care and love someone, you will do everything in your power to be with he/she. Well, that's not the case with him. He's came to KL on a few occassions but did not take the time to come and see me. How does that make me feel? I do understand if he is busy or whatever but at least please show some effort. Right now, i am just going to carry on and wait what is going to happen next.

If I want to go for someone that is responsible and financial stability, B is that person. I don't mind him being far away. I care so much for him and do love him...just that sometimes i felt that he took me for granted. Maybe because i am not being fussy and complaint that much.

A is not financially stabil and his out of job at the moment. ( as for now i can tolerate with that ) but he will be working soon. He is a nice guy and for the fact that he's here make me sometimes thinks that i know him a bit better than B.

I do i feel that i am being unfair, but when come to think about it, why should i care? All these while, i have been taking care of other people feelings and ignoring mine. Perhaps, this time around i should be thinking of myself.

Am i being self-centered?

No comments: